Jan 2006

Screw Nawlins!

Mr. President,
Screw New Orleans they only represent 9 electoral votes and there are now more Republicans in the state because Katrina did a better job of redistricting than Tom Delay ever could. You can't justify spending $85 billion to chase after 9 lousy electoral votes! And besides you know all those poor black people's votes (those who voted anyway), you saw on TV weren't counted anyway.

Condoleeza Rice has the impossible task of trying to keep Abbas in some kind of position of power. Give her some extra spending money junior, so she can buy some shoes. Israel's use of American helicopters, and jets against rock-throwing Palestinians seems to have caused a small backlash.
By the way think about sending your whole cabinet to negotiations school junior. Hard-line tactics that you and Sharon used only increases the power of terrorist groups like Al Queada and Hamas. You must learn to be more than a one-trick pony Georgie boy.

Think about this, the more you say "there's no doubt in my mind it is legal." the more it sounds like you are saying "I am not a crook".

You might get to put Harriet back on the list if Ann Coulter gets her way. She made a Freudian slip at Philander Smith College when she said "We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' crème Brule," She went on to say "That's just a joke, for you in the media," but I don’t think Justice Stevens is laughing.

Why do you bait the dems with silly comments like calling Sen. Hillary Clinton, a potential candidate for the Democratic presidential nomination, as "formidable, Do you think they were waiting for you to say ooooh I’m afraid of Hillary.”

You haven't mentioned Lincoln in quite a while. Do you think you can fit him in somewhere around promoting nuke power, "I am not a criminal" and "everything is ok” speech next Tuesday?

Kudos junior! Nominating Hillman for a federal judgeship was a nice move junior. Noel L. Hillman was the lead prosecutor in day-to-day management of the Abramoff investigation since it began almost two year ago. He must have been awfully close to something really hot for you to promote him to a judgeship to get him out of there. This move pretty much ends his involvement in the Amramoff inquiry. If you can't fire them promote them out of the picture.

Alito is a shoe in the dems never had have a chance, in fact they look more silly than normal, but did you ever wonder if Alito is really going to tow the conservative party line after he gets in? He might decide to follow what the Constitution's founders intended instead.
From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 28, 2006 2:37:38 PM CST
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

No Purple Thumbs.

Mr. President,
There were no purple thumbs shown after the latest Mid-East election but a lot of middle fingers were sure aimed at you junior. If you would have only had your buddy Diebold send them some voting machines you wouldn't have to worry about Hamas having any impact on the Palestinian elections at all. In the meantime "Let Freedom Ring" right?

Why are you so afraid of personal confrontation junior? Yesterday you took questions from everyone around Helen Thomas during his 45-minute press conference. But even though she sat in the front-row, center seat. You know Helen called you a coward She also called questioned your manhood when she said afterwards "He's supposed to be this macho guy. He'll take on Osama bin Laden, but he won't take me on." Maybe you could get Laura to go and beat her up for you.

Speaking of weak people, is Brownie at Medicare? Because it seems like your new Medicare message is "No Seniors Left Healthy".

Putti Put is using oil like you use your armed forces. Gazprom is proposing to takeover a large British energy enterprise, Scottish Power. As a result, the Russian company will carry up to 20 percent of gas imports to Great Britain by 2015. Remember how he tripled the cost oil to the "Orange Revolution" and then they blew up two gas pipelines going to the Ukraine. That sure put Europe on notice. He didn't even fire one shot to get their attention.

Just a note here junior the next time you are asked why ''$12.7 billion was cut from education you should answering it a little better than just saying ''At the federal level?" Maybe you should wear that funny suit you wore at the debate with Kerry. You know the one with the unusual hump in the back so Karl can call in a better answer. College students have been a trip this week haven't they? They were either asking you embarrassing questions about things you knew nothing about or they were acting rudely to your attorney general.

Be careful about touting the economy next week. If the economy is doing so well and unemployment is at 4.9%, why were there over 25,000 applicants for 325 positions available for a new Walmart outside of Chicago this last week? Did someone miscount some of the unemployed or did all those people just coincidentally happen to be vacationing in Evergreen Park?


Have you been salivating at China’s latest move? You too can use your "executive directive" to block certain sites on the Internet. You can say you need to block sites to make sure Al Queda can not use the internet to help them plot an attack on our country. You can call it "Neutralizing International Terrorist Web Sites" not "Internet Censorship". After all Congress already gave you the power to do this when they approved your ability to attack Iraq! And you can also say you will block porn sites and make your “base” smile.

You say you won't negotiate with terrorists to obtain the release of Jill Carol but you're sure pretty set about keeping the terrorist Luis Posada Carriles from standing trial in Venezuela for blowing up an airline in 1973 and killing 73 people. Does this sound a little odd? Or do we just support terrorists when it suits our political agenda. Some people are also questioning your policy about putting Iraqi women in prison because the women's male relatives might be insurgents. Didn't the Nazis do the same thing in Poland?

p.s.
The clock is ticking junior. No it's not the bird flu it's the " I " word. The news is just starting to mutate into something really interesting. Even without the global warming you deny exists, it’s going to be a hot time in DC this summer.

As of 10:42 p.m. CST I have not received the usual "Thank you for taking the time to write" memo I usually get.

Is Catching Osama Really That Urgent?

Mr. President,

I heard you said on Wednesday that "Americans should take Osama bin Laden seriously." This just begs the question. If he is so important why haven't you caught him? You are commander in chief of the most powerful military power the world. Could it be that a free Osama is much more valuable to your political agenda, so he can make occasional videos to keep Americans in a state of fear?


Does it keep you up nights that China now owns $819 billion of our currency? This is quite odd because they could make more money by investing it into their own economy. Do you wonder what they are up to? And China's trade with us is now $300 billion which makes them larger than Japan's. China is fast become the largest economy engine in the world. And they are presently siding with Iran.


The military jury in Colorado is making it hard for Karen to "win hearts and minds" when the penalty for murdering an iraqi prisoner during an interrogation session is a reprimand. Seems like spilling Iraq blood is comparable to tossing garbage out of a car window.


Did you know that In Iraq, the Marines place the troops' bodies, their family photos and other belongings in metal cases packed with 40 pounds of ice each. 40 pounds of ice to keep the body and or body parts from further deterioration. How many tons of ice will they need this year junior?

Meanwhile Rick Santorum is doing what he can to promote recruitment into the armed services. He recently asked "What I am asking all of you tonight, is not to put on a uniform. Put on a bumper sticker."


Here is a question bouncing around the internet. What would we do if we lived in 1936 Germany as Hitler used propaganda, fear and threats to consolidating his power? What did these Germans of 1944 wish they had done a decade earlier?

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 26, 2006 10:43:40 PM CST
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Can you get Alberto's wife to cry?

Can you get Rebecca to cry at the upcoming Congressional hearings where Alberto is scheduled to meet on the Hill regarding DOMESTIC SPYING?
Is Rummy not used to dissent from anyone? You bet!

"Canadians voted for hope over fear and accountability over corruption," senior Conservative Jason Kenney said. I wonder if American voters will do the same this November?

I think I heard some administration officials have already typed up the planned leaking of good "news" that the Iraqi police force is making significant strides. It will therefore only be natural that since "the situation on the ground" has improved significantly, June would be a good time to formally announce the partial pullout.

The pr was "We will not stay there one more day than what we have to" right junior. The summer photo ops of returning soldiers during September would be just about perfect. Time to fit on that flight suit!

Why you bother with this nation of slackers is a wonder. If it wasn't for all those unpatriotic young slackers you could avoid the guaranteed bad news about a fractured Iraq in January 2007. Who knew that "Thin Green Line" would snap in May, because of low recruitment and retention? Damn that Krepinevich!

Here is a way out. Use the Air Force and CIA drones to drop those "perfectly targeted" smart bombs that can only kill Insurgents. You have plenty of videos from the first Gulf War of bombs hitting a window in a bunker to show the country how you can surgically strike down our enemies in this "New Phase of the War on Terror." You know Fox will happily set aside whatever time is needed to show the videos over and over.

You said, "I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees. They did anticipate a serious storm." Is this from the same person who wrote " Who would have thought that terrorists would use planes as weapons"? And "I do not recall meeting Abramoff." You're look like a "deceiver" again. Isn't it funny how bits of truth come out regardless of how hard you try to cover it up? (See FEMA and NISAC reports)

p.s.
Think about this for a minute, the pictures of you and Abramoff and you and "KennyBoy" are not as damaging as Rummy's picture of him shaking hands with Saddam Hussein.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 25, 2006 3:31:22 PM CST
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Mr. President,
Tough things seem to happen to your war supporters, Ukraine gets hit with a huge gas bill then Georgia's gas pipeline is destroyed with mysterious explosions during a record cold freeze resulting in millions of people with no heat. Romania and Poland are on the EU's hit list for managing U.S. vacation spas in Europe without a permit. Mushararraf is up to his armpits in protesters and Sharon is a carrot.

No good deed goes unpunished.

Speaking of good deeds your handholding buddy from Saudi Arabia is making nice to China and granting them more oil. Maybe they figured out how to squeeze oil out of a rock instead of just blood. The good news is that means higher oil prices and more money will be available for Republicans in November. Don't worry, you can placate the sheep, I mean the base about the higher gas prices.

How about making some hollow remarks about "developing alternative energy sources" It has a nice ring to it. Just like "terrorist surveillance." You guys would make a killing writing jingles. That would be a refreshing change, Instead of just killing.

Did those mean Secret Service men remove Ambamoff's picture out from under your pillow? Don't cry junior, at least they left Cheney's picture there, for now.

I heard Rummy is quite happy with his hand picket generals. I understand he has them all wired so they shake their heads in unison. Just like your staff.

p.s.
You got to get someone to talk to the USAID about their recent analysis on Iraq. It kind makes you look like you are ... how do we say it "considerably exaggerating the facts." or is it just a fundraiser? Either way they don't sound like team players.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 24, 2006 12:06:04 PM CST
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

A Second American Revolution?

Mr. President,

It is a long known fact that humiliation, frustration and all the "divides" invite terrorism. Are you "trying" to start a second American revolution?

Bad things are happening too quickly junior and the frog in the pan is starting to notice the temperature change.

Better hire more analysts for NSA Talon and CIFA. Everyone knows most people voted against you rather than for Kerry in 2004. Add up all your “new fans” from continuing Iraq violence, Katrina, new job losses, the Medicare fiasco, Abramoff, Libby, Alito, corrupt Republican Congressmen, Delay, Iran, North Korea, South America, rising energy costs, rising health costs, lack of health insurance, (By the way your lack of credibility will sink Health Savings Accounts just like your Social Security plan), illegal immigrants, and illegal wire taps. Now you have a following! I would start by rolling back the second amendment and enlist Charleston Heston to help calm the NRA down.

Millions of people have had their lives significantly changed for the worse and yet you consistently ignore them. Worse than that, you penalize them, which only adds fuel to the fire of their discontent.

Consider pulling back the National Guard.

Count them up junior there are a lot more disadvantaged than affluent that have prospered under your regime. Everything you are doing reinforces your position as a callous and indifferent leader.

p.s.
Tell, "Rain man" that some people were embarrassed when he recently posed the following question to a number of Republicans "What do you call a dictator with a nuclear bomb? ...Sir! "
Many of them messed up the punch line and inadvertently yelled out “George Bush while others blurted out Kim Jong-il.

As of 3: 42 pm
I did not receive an automated message from the White House after I sent this one in.

Can you still get votes with "Danger Danger Will Robinson"?

Mr. President,
Security is the word says Rove. How often can that old horse run? You better get some alerts lined up between here and November for that old ploy to work. You need more "chatter"
Isn't that what got Libby under indictment, his chatter.

Where's the beef?

Maybe you should have let that cattle rancher pre-inspect his beef like he wanted to. Too late now. It will take years to get all that Japan beef export back up.

Let's give the rich all the money and be done with it junior.
Before you brag about the economy again check out the stock market and see if any of the dow companies are not laying off thousands of workers.

Loose lips sink ships.
Pentagon Analyst Franklin was sentenced to 12 years+ on "take out the garbage"-friday. Didn't he help you and Rumsfield cheery-pick CIA information on Iraq? Huh! Imagine, you having traitors in the administration.
How long do you think you can personally keep China from acquiring additionally nuclear reactor technology? Blair does not owe you a thing, especially since you have ignored Tony since the day he signed on with you on Iraq.

Safety First!
When you go to Virginia for a photo op. You can get a bullhorn and stand on some coal wearing a miners hat. Rub some dust on your cheeks and use some of those generators you used in New Orleans to shine some bright lights on a backdrop that says. Safety First ... Profits Are Secondary, Honest!

Cheapskate Hughes
Can you increase Karen's allowance? If she is still trying to win "hearts and minds" by giving $2 million to support the Palestinian Authority against Hamas is not going to be enough.

It's a medical conundrum.

Lets see you support keeping tubes into people in Florida even though next of kin is against it, but you don't agree it should be done in Texas.
And if a doctor prescribes pain medication for someone in pain, they can go to jail for drug trafficking in many states, but it is ok in Florida for Rush Limbaugh to "doctor shop" piles of "hillbilly heroin" for himself.
Sounds like Florida is the place to be, if you don't mind all the FEMA trailers.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 22, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

You got one major hit junior are you shooting for another?

January 19, 2006
Mr. President,


Congratulations! I heard Al Queda has already decide to grant you their lifetime achievement award as "Recruiter of the Year" for invading Iraq. I understand that you may get a special award for tying up American counter intelligence assets by wiretapping Americans that could have otherwise been used to find real terrorists.


Cheney is also in the running for best supporting actor by promoting the NSA wiretapping program with his claims of saving thousands of lives.


On a different note, every one knows what a kidder you are. This will be reinforced in 21 days when Tony Blair will have to release the memo of your conversation suggesting the bombing of Aljazeera.


Speaking of propaganda, tell Hastert that it is no use to close the barn door now the cows have already escaped.


And here is someone who didn't escape. Call Arnold and see if he can send you a tape of Clarence Ray Allen's last breath. You know you want to see it, for old times sake.


From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 17, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Cheney and Bibi sitting in a tree.

Mr. President,
American contractors have hit it big from your production of The Iraq My Father Didn't Know.

Lets compare the money you gave Iraq contractors against the money the movie Titanic raked in over the life of the movie. Titanic brought in about $1.8 billion. But your hit is bringing in twice as much for Cheney's buddies, every week. It's a hit with a bullet. Reality shows are in, buddy.

There are the critics however and unfortunately many soldiers are just dying to get out of this production. I heard over 2,200 just died laughing and over 30,000 had to be carried out of the theatre New customers are getting harder to get. Maybe allowing gem-x post boomers into the show will help get your numbers up.

Berlusconi is pulling out his 2500 troops this year, something about spring elections.  He is saying something like you did but without the aircraft carrier and the flight suit. On the bright side, you can put 2500 more KBR employees on contract and fatten up The Carlyle Group's wallet that much more. 

Here is the question of the day.  How do you think Cheney and "Bibi" are going to deal with the Abramoff fallout and something called the Capital Athletic Foundation? The money-laundering web just gets better and better with Israel, London law firms, cruise ships and Russian oil, boy you can't make this up. Netanyahu and Cheney wouldn't be trying to plan a distraction like a war with Syria or even Iran or both?
 
You got the making of another great new hit here junior.
From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 17, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Watching your administration operate is like watching a boa constrictor suffocate its prey

Mr. President,

Your strategy to deal with our nation's poor is becoming more obvious.

Under your tutelage, a child is born into poverty every 36 seconds.

"No Child Left Behind" program is proving to be a wonderful way of keeping poor kids stupid.

And either jail or the military service will take care of many young frustrated adults that will not find employment.

Finally, your Medicare program now seems to be the final piece in your "triangle attack" against those three low income age groups.

As you struggle to manage your image for the history books, I wouldn't worry about anyone comparing you with Martin Luther King.


p.s.
While Cheney is in the Middle East could he stop by and visit Sharon? If the "Butcher" can only see Cheney perhaps he could get Sharon's trigger finger to flinch.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 16, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

¿Como Esta Sur America?

Mr. President,
Make sure you inform the CIA operatives going to Venezuela's Foro Social Mundial on 24 al 29 de Enero that item no. 2 of the 6 themes may be of most importance. "Imperial strategies and resistances of peoples"

I'm sure the issue of Spain's expected arms sales to Venezuela will also be a hot topic as well as Michelle Bachelet's victory in Chili's recent election.

You are doing a great job of uniting South America junior, too bad it is against America.
From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 15, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Nawlins and Iran

Mr. President,

I heard your speech today. Just curious about the part where you said "New Orleans of today is reminding me of the city I used to come to visit."

Just how wasted were you,  when you visited New Orleans?

By the way, The Axis Of Evil phrase from your first State of the Union speech sure has had a lot of payoffs. 

You got Iran to realize they don't have a choice but to develop their nuclear program in case you get a message from god to invade their country. 

Can you say North Korea? 

Heck of a job junior, heck of a job


From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 12, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Another one bites the dust.

Mr. President,

I bet you wished Castro would have died a lonely unpopular man.
Chile seems to be the latest country to have a LLL, (Leftest Leaning Leader). And a lot of it is due to the inspiring model of capitalism you have promoted with your compassionate and thoughtful leadership.
How can those South American countries shun American capitalism when you have proven how your system of consistent catering to big business and the rich has been so effective at leveling the playing field to make the United States such a successful example of "trickle down economics"
Maybe it's the record number of unemployed, credit debt, foreclosures, people without health insurance, and the dwindling status of our school systems, while having record company profits, "productivity" with the Dow hitting 11,000.
Nothing breeds success like success.
From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 12, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

It is important for people to know their place.

Mr. President

I am glad you reminded our nation that somethings can not be talked about.

We are free to criticize as long as the topic is something you approve of.

Got it.

Is that both under the seas and under fire too?

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 10, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Sorry to hear about your hospital visit.

Mr. Vice President,

Is your black heart in it's last throes? It may just be worn out from pumping infected bile instead of human blood.

Or perhaps all those lies and the death you brought to this world is taking its toll, Mr. Vice President.
You could do the world a favor, join the "Butcher" and then both of you could be placed in the same room with lots of light. I know people would pay to watch you both slowly vegetate while you drool all over yourself.

If you don't get well soon, who will make sure people get tortured? Who will make sure Americans get spied on?



From: vice_president@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 9, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

Thank you for e-mailing Vice President Cheney. Your comments,
suggestions and concerns are important to him. Unfortunately,
because of the large volume of e-mail received, the Vice
President cannot personally respond to each message. However,
members of the Vice President's staff consider and report
citizen ideas and concerns. Please visit the White House web
site for the most up-to-date information on Presidential
initiatives, current events, and topics of interest to you.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

You Deserve a Medal.

Mr. President,

How is that ugly cedar wound Mr President?

Since you are Commander In Chief does that mean you should give yourself a purple heart?

I liked the way you tried to compare yourself to those wounded soldiers at the Brooke Army Medical Center, who lost limbs, and eyes.

You showed the world your war-wounds incurred in the war on terror, but you didn't tell them how you single handedly killed that vicious al-qaeda cedar!

I bet those quadriplegics were proud to know their president was also a wounded warrior, just like them.

You are truly inspiring Mr President.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 7, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

Yada Yada Congress

Mr. President,

Nice job on installing England and Smith as a recess appointments regardless of their apparent conflicts of interest. I understand how that particular habit is so hard to break. And besides Congress is such a pain with all their yadda, yadda , yadda, talk about what THEY think is right and wrong for the country.

Gathering all those Secretary of States was a nice photo op, but everyone could tell just how upset you were when you heard "dissenting" opinions. Note to self, photo op and spin be damned if I invite anyone to the oval office again to disagree with me. Screw Turd Blossom and his bright ideas of popping the "bubble" perception. Next time ask all of them to send in their opinions, so they can be screened.

Think retirement and don't clutter your mind with "stuff," just keep remembering that ten years from now everyone will sing your praises. Repeat after me, "ten years from now, ten years from now."

p.s. remember to claim that $6000 on your tax return and send Sharon a get well card.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: January 5, 2006
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.