No Purple Thumbs.

Mr. President,
There were no purple thumbs shown after the latest Mid-East election but a lot of middle fingers were sure aimed at you junior. If you would have only had your buddy Diebold send them some voting machines you wouldn't have to worry about Hamas having any impact on the Palestinian elections at all. In the meantime "Let Freedom Ring" right?

Why are you so afraid of personal confrontation junior? Yesterday you took questions from everyone around Helen Thomas during his 45-minute press conference. But even though she sat in the front-row, center seat. You know Helen called you a coward She also called questioned your manhood when she said afterwards "He's supposed to be this macho guy. He'll take on Osama bin Laden, but he won't take me on." Maybe you could get Laura to go and beat her up for you.

Speaking of weak people, is Brownie at Medicare? Because it seems like your new Medicare message is "No Seniors Left Healthy".

Putti Put is using oil like you use your armed forces. Gazprom is proposing to takeover a large British energy enterprise, Scottish Power. As a result, the Russian company will carry up to 20 percent of gas imports to Great Britain by 2015. Remember how he tripled the cost oil to the "Orange Revolution" and then they blew up two gas pipelines going to the Ukraine. That sure put Europe on notice. He didn't even fire one shot to get their attention.

Just a note here junior the next time you are asked why ''$12.7 billion was cut from education you should answering it a little better than just saying ''At the federal level?" Maybe you should wear that funny suit you wore at the debate with Kerry. You know the one with the unusual hump in the back so Karl can call in a better answer. College students have been a trip this week haven't they? They were either asking you embarrassing questions about things you knew nothing about or they were acting rudely to your attorney general.

Be careful about touting the economy next week. If the economy is doing so well and unemployment is at 4.9%, why were there over 25,000 applicants for 325 positions available for a new Walmart outside of Chicago this last week? Did someone miscount some of the unemployed or did all those people just coincidentally happen to be vacationing in Evergreen Park?

Have you been salivating at China’s latest move? You too can use your "executive directive" to block certain sites on the Internet. You can say you need to block sites to make sure Al Queda can not use the internet to help them plot an attack on our country. You can call it "Neutralizing International Terrorist Web Sites" not "Internet Censorship". After all Congress already gave you the power to do this when they approved your ability to attack Iraq! And you can also say you will block porn sites and make your “base” smile.

You say you won't negotiate with terrorists to obtain the release of Jill Carol but you're sure pretty set about keeping the terrorist Luis Posada Carriles from standing trial in Venezuela for blowing up an airline in 1973 and killing 73 people. Does this sound a little odd? Or do we just support terrorists when it suits our political agenda. Some people are also questioning your policy about putting Iraqi women in prison because the women's male relatives might be insurgents. Didn't the Nazis do the same thing in Poland?

The clock is ticking junior. No it's not the bird flu it's the " I " word. The news is just starting to mutate into something really interesting. Even without the global warming you deny exists, it’s going to be a hot time in DC this summer.

As of 10:42 p.m. CST I have not received the usual "Thank you for taking the time to write" memo I usually get.