Jul 2006
Cheney

Bombing of Lebanon should continue until democracy breaks out.

Mr. President,
Although Cheney and Rice do not like each other, they both seem to agree that the decimation of Lebanon is good for different reasons.

In Rome, Condi sees
opportunity in the Lebanon battle and says Lebanon will be stronger for it in the end with a stronger democracy than what they had before. Does she really believe this crap, is she parroting your misguided and foolish ideals or just stalling for time to allow Israel more time to bomb the crap out of Lebanon?

Mr. "locked and loaded" Cheney, on the other hand uses a different set of rose-colored glasses when he views Lebanon.

Cheney spoke at a fundraising appearance last Friday, for GOP congressional candidate, Gus Bilirakis, a state legislator who is running for the Tampa Bay area congressional seat.
ABC news covered the event and reported that "Vice-president Dick Cheney pointed to the fighting between Israel and Hezbollah as fresh evidence of the ongoing battle against terrorism that underscores the need to keep President Bush's Republican allies in control of Congress."
may02
You had no compunction to politicize the events of 9/11 as part of your reelection campaign so it makes sense that Cheney would politicize the death and destruction in Lebanon to help reelect Republican Congressmen in a desperate attempt to keep Republican in control of both houses and keep himself and you from being impeached.
may06
If Democrats take the House they will hold investigations of every controversial and probably illegal action since you took the office.

I can appreciate the desperate situation you and Cheney find yourself in.

How can Cheney " be so whacked out to think that the resulting and significantly higher level of danger to Americans brought about by all your monumental screw ups can become a plus in a re-election campaign for Republicans?


Speaking about Mr. "Locked-and-Seriously-loaded", he should know about a duck hunter who was recently
diagnosed with a strain of Avian Flu. He might have to wear that chemical suit he carries around with him before he goes shooting for
may04 may05
An American duck hunter and two state wildlife employees had contracted an uncommon type of bird flu virus in their blood. So Cheney better cut back on the number of hunting trips he has to shoot fellow hunters. He may want to hunt in his chemical suit.

The virus found in their blood stream was H11N9 bird virus, which is not known to be dangerous to humans.

The deadly Avian virus circulating in wild and domestic birds is H5N1.

"To our knowledge, this study is the first to show direct transmission of influenza A virus from wild birds to humans," Dr. James Gill of the University of Iowa and colleagues wrote in their report. But the medical implication is that bird virus can and will evolve into a form which will infect humans, so haw far away is the deadly for of bird flu? No one knows, nature will decide that for us. Mother nature is a bitch sometimes.

Speaking about bitches, Neo-conservatives have no apparent love for Condi, but if she can stage for an invasion of Syria and Iran they will be the first to make Condi their pin up girl. Cheney is doing his part by consistently attacking Russia's management of their oil, China's military buildup, North pursuit of beginning Armageddon, and finally Iran and Syria's obvious need to be bend to his will.

The worse the world becomes the more Cheny seems to revel in the ashes of your presidency, like a dog who joyfully rolls around in its own shit.

may01

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: July 26, 2006 7:39:31 PM CDT
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
The President is committed to continuing our economic progress,
defending our freedom, and upholding our Nation's deepest values.

Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House
cannot respond to every message. Please visit the White House
website for the most up-to-date information on Presidential
initiatives, current events, and topics of interest to you.
In order to better receive comments from the public, a new system
has been implemented. In the future please send your comments to
comments@whitehouse.gov.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

It's a wonderful life George.

Mr. President,
I was sorting through my dvd's late last night before I hit the sack and crashed hard into a deep sleep. I had a strange dream and you were in it junior.

You were sitting in your office in the West Wing, down on your luck, your poll numbers are the lowest of your presidency and the world's leaders were openly mocking you. You wonder if life as president is worth living anymore.

Lots of Christian fundamentalists and FOX viewers noticed your plight and were praying for you until God's main angel, Joseph, heard their prayers and sent down Clarence, angel 2nd class to help you.

This last week, the American people finally took noticed of your bankrupt policies, and you had no political capital to cover the shortfall in credibility. All you had in your pocket, was a lousy fear-of-terrorism policy that was not worth very much these days.

You went to Cheney, the meanest richest most vile man in town at his dark undisclosed location and pleaded to help you get more public support, but he had less credibility that you did. You had no where to go and wondered if life in the West Wing was really worth it with such low poll numbers.
may04
Your father warned you about Cheney, but you ignored those road signs on the campaign trail that said, "Ask your Father."

You decided to go riding on your mountain bike when you thought about taking a header hard enough to break something small like a wrist, which could get you a sympathetic bump in the polls, when suddenly this old man in a long white nightgown falls from the sky right in front of you.

"Are you all right there old guy?" You ask. "What are you doing out here where is my security detail? "I didn't fall, I jumped in front of you to stop you from hurting yourself," said Clarance.
may05
"You shouldn't think about hurting yourself Georrge, besides you are a sadist not a masochist anyway," said Clarence. "I'm your guardian angel Clarence," he continues. "You look like the kind of angel I would get, you wouldn't know how to raise my poll numbers would you?" "No no no, we don't need poll numbers in heaven." Well they are pretty handy down here bub.

Things are so bad right now, sometimes I wish we hadn't fixed those elections to make me President. "Well, let me see; yea that could do it; you are not President," exclaimed Clarence.

I must have hit my head or sniffed some bad coke. Say something in that ear. I'll be dog gone, I haven't been able to hear from that ear since I pushed a pencil in it to get a deferment, before my daddy got me into the National Guard to avoid the Vietnam War. "Your ear is ok George," said Clarence. "You have never been born." You search through your pockets frantically. "You have no cheat-cheat with the names of your cabinet, no GOP talking points. They're not there either," said Clarence What!. "Condi's ear rings, the ones she took off before you two, ... well you know," says Clarence.
travers_clarence_small[1]
Let's go and get a drink old fella. Do you drink? I don't trust anyone that doesn't drink.

Are you hurt from your fall? If you can prove you are an American, you can sign up for my new Medicare Plan but you'll have to pay a fee. "I don't need Medicare, George, I'm your guardian angel, besides it's just a fart in the wind as far as health coverage goes. You know that" Clarence said.


Let's go to Abramoff's bar at "Signatures." Wait the sign says "Boehner's Restaurant, where is Amramoff? "Who do you say?" The bartender yells. Amramoff, you repeat. " There ain't no Amramoff here, he's in jail after getting caught. And if you know him you must be a stoolie too. We serve extremely expensive food and drink here for Republican lobbyists and corrupt Congressmen. Now do you want to make a healthy donation to the party and buy a drink or not!" He yells.

"Ok Ok, give me a beer and a bag of coke. What do you want old fella?," you say. "Ring" "Oh, did you hear that? Every time a bell rings a Democrat goes to hell," says Clarence. "OK out you two go," yells the bartender.



You run to your mother's house. An old ugly woman with white hair carefully peers out through the chained front door. "What do you want!" she yells. Mom don't you know me I'm your son, George. "I don't have a son named George, the old woman cackled. " You mean as much to me are as those people at the Superdome, now get out of here," she demanded.
may02
You sneak into the West Wing via a secret passage you remembered, but no one is there. The room is decorated with pictures and statues of Arabian horses. Suddenly you find a name plate on your desk. It says President Michael Brown.

You read the presidential daily briefings on the desk. The Iraq war is still a disaster, thousands of Americans have been killed and injured; Iraq has been effectively leveled leaving chaos and civil war. North Korea continues to test fire their missiles, and Iran keeps building their nuclear power stations. Israel is fighting Hamas and Hezbollah at the same time. The world condemns Brown and Israel for their massive bombing of Lebanon's infrastructure killing scores of civilians. Russia is using her energy resources to have their way with the EU. Finally, China and India are gobbling as much raw material and energy sources.

The world was just like it was when you were president. It didn't make any difference if you were there or not! The government was actually run by old man Cheney from an undisclosed location! The neo-cons and radical right wing are using Michael Brown the same way they used you. They just made you think you were running the country!

What happened to Laura you ask? "I'm not supposed to tell you," said Clarence. Tell me, you demand. Tell me! "Well I hate to tell you George, but she was so homely she never married. She is an old maid closing up the Library of Congress," blurted Clarence. You run out of the White House via the same secret passage, but an alarm went off and secret service men rush into the room and pin Clarence down. "Joseph, help!" Clarence shouts. Suddenly Clarence disappears as his plastic cuffs fall onto the carpet.
may13
Clarence reappears outside of the White House next to you. "You have been given an extraordinary gift George. A look at what would the world look like without you." Clarence said. And now you realize it didn't matter if you were president! Everyone around you created the disasters. You were just a face, a bit player someone who shook hands and raised money! You had very little say! Everything was scripted and stage managed. But, on the bright side. You didn't have to work at all. You suddenly realize everything you have been doing was busy work to keep you out of the neo-con's hair! "You had a pretty easy life George," Clarence said.
may03
You fall on your knees close your eyes and pray to your God. "I want to be president again, I want to be president again! " you pray.

You open your eyes in time to see anti-war demonstrators approach and decide to run back into the White House where you are greeted by Turd Blossom, Karl Rove. Where have you been Mr. President? he asks.

Do you recognize me Turd? Why sure, you are supposed to go to Pennsylvania and stump for Santorum; he's in deep shit." said Rove "That's great!" you exclaimed.

You run to the West Wing and are greeted by Laura and your drunken daughters. Jenna and Barbara Bush "Hiyyyyy daddy," they slur. "Oh George," Laura blurts out something wonderful has happened. "Oh good reporters heh heh." you scream. "Cheney threatened to fund their opposition in the next election, so all the Republican congressmen have agreed to support your Iraq war budget isn't it wonderful. That should boost your poll numbers for a little while!" Laura exclaims. And you also remember, you have a month-long vacation starting in two weeks!
Your family closes in around you.
may09
Suddenly, Jenna Bush hears bells ringing in her ears "Heyyyyy daddy, I just heard bells, an and you know what! Every time, time a bell ringssssh a Democrat goes (hickup) to hell," she slurs.
may06
"That's right Jenna, that's right. It's a wonderful life after all! Atta boy Clarence!" you cheer as Condi sneaks up behind you and gives you a sly wink.



I woke up ran into the living room, grabbed my copy of the Frank Capra classic and burned it in my Weber grill.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: July 20, 2006 6:58:20 PM CDT
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

I see an honorary Degree from Northwestern in your future.

Mr. President,
There is one particular honor that you will receive but it is dependent on minimizing the amount of time you open your mouth without  assistance from your handlers.

The strategy for your public appearances must have all been planned back in 2001. Somehow they also needed to keep you away from Washington as much as possible; hence the month long vacations here and there.
may10 may02 may01
It's no wonder you are not getting involved in Lebanon you need a gang of handlers to tell you what to think and say and that takes time.

Watching your public performance on the world stage over the last five years. I understand why the CIA calls Cheney "
Edgar" the ventriloquist for a reason.
may19
Your presidency makes complete sense if people just understand you are a facade, a show. Is it any wonder that any foreign statesmen and women who personally meet you, make so much fun of you? My God why wouldn't they!
may06 may05 may09
The plan must have been to minimize contact with average people and reporters so your handlers scheduled the fewest press conferences of any president. Every public appearance had to be stage-managed. Only pre-cleared bush-loyalists were allowed to attend public gatherings and all questions were pre-clear. Everything possible was done to keep you from speaking directly and openly about what you really thought, to keep you from embarrassing yourself.
may08 may07
It has been so easy for neo-cons like Cheney to take over our government. All they had to do was promise you a part-time job. They would take care of everything else. They told you they would tell you what you needed to know. Just smile swagger and talk folksy. Just don't try to talk substance, as you know it and everything will be fine.

You had to be sealed off from the world so the only news you got was what your handlers want you to know. It's no wonder you sat and read My Pet Goat when we were attacked on 9/11. You had no idea what to do or say by yourself. Andrew Card had to come in and pull you away. Cheney and others made the decisions to ground the airplanes and put our Air Force on alert.

Your delayed reaction on disasters like 9/11, the Indonesian tsunami and Katrina were examples of either your inability to make decisions or that your handlers didn't tell you because they did not feel you could manage it.

Others in your administration, especially Cheney were left to make the real decisions based on their faulty ideology. A rubber-stamp Congress and an inept government laden with nepotism complete the picture of what America inherited.

Conferences where your attendance is required must make everyone in your administration nervous. They never know what stupid thing you will say or do. They have to come up with various schemes to spin the news to explain or blame someone else. I especially like the spin calling your tongue-tied butchering of the English language, as endearing.

Cheney got the best job of all. People who voted for a Bush-Cheney ticket did not realize they actually got a Cheney-Bush presidency.

Cheney gets to run the country from the shadows while Rove and his minions minimize your exposure to the public fearing the exposure of your ignorance and ineptness.
frontcheney
Unfortunate you are getting all the black eyes for all of Cheney and Rove’s destructive and failed policies. Although, their marketing of purposefully pessimistic low expectations for your policies, make the higher actual numbers look good in comparison. For example we recently got to cheer about a less than expected deficit this last month hurrah! The bad news isn't as bad as it could be right junior.

Since Tom Delay finally succumbed to his excessive greed and was forced to leave Congress, Cheney has increased time on the Hill to twist arms and threaten congressional leaders to get his agenda passed. Pre-emptive war and 1 per cent solutions are indicative of a neo con war hawk like "Locked and Seriously Loaded Cheney.

You have had the task of glad-handing and back-slapping at Republican fund raisers, smile during carefully choreographed photo opportunities with the public, amble, stutter, and guffaw with loyal Republican crowds, knowing your staff has carefully screened the people and any questions which are asked.

It's harder to avoid embarrassing questions overseas where the press has not been cowed. Your trip to Germany was one long photo shoot but a previously planned town hall meeting was
scrubbed when your staff was not allowed to pre-approve the questions you were going to be asked. No one on your staff wanted you to speak off the cuff like you did during the first debate with Kerry. You looked and sounded like an impatient frat boy who wanted to get those questions over with and get to a keger afterwards.



The reason fellow Republicans say you are someone they could have a drink with is that you ARE that kind of guy. A guy with lots of money, a trust-fund baby, they may find in a neighborhood bar or fishing hole. You have no worries and just want to have a good time, unencumbered by the weight of a real job since your handlers are doing all your thinking and planning for you.

One of the reasons the neo-cons favored you for the presidency was that you have no real desire to actually run the country; you just want to have the accouterments of the office and the status. You have no empathy so they didn't worry about you carrying about anyone else but yourself.

I believe that one of the reasons flag-draped caskets are not shown to the public was as much for you as well as the American people. Your handlers did not want you to be exposed to soldier's deaths and risk any kind of "feelings" for the soldier or their families. They want you to keep thinking about our troops as nothing more than pieces on a chessboard. It is also why you have not attended any military funerals.

The recent candid video of you and Tony Blair added with other glimpses of your off camera performances are indicative of what has really happening in Washington since you took office. Additional
shenanigans like grabbing German Chancellor Merkel by the neck, shows your inability to bring any dignity to the office.

Giving a woman an unwanted neck rub like In any business setting in the United States could bring you a harassment suit. Are you so clueless about these things because you never worked for a living?
The bottom line is that since the start Cheney was to run the government in the shadows as he implements every trick in the book to implement the neo-con agenda, and sideline congressional overview as he expanded the executive power of the office he runs for you.

Have you seen Dave the 1993 comedy movie with Kevin Kline and Sigourney Weaver? I saw the movie several times.
Kline plays Dave Kovic, who has a side job impersonating the real President of the United States. The President has a sever stroke and the Chief of Staff decides to keep the president's illness a secret by having Kline's character impersonate the President while the Chief of Staff secretly runs the government. Kline plays the patsy and performs as the President of the United States, under the direction of his Chief of Staff, until Kline's character begins to feel he can make a difference and grows the balls to challenge the Chief of Staff.

I wish life would imitate art but in real life you have no plans to buck Cheney or his neo-cons. Even if you suddenly grew balls the neo cons have flourished like maggots in a dead body
Although history will record your presidency as one of the worst in our history, Northwestern University may very well grant you an honorary degree for your performance as President much like Ventriloquist Edgar Bergen's dummy, Charlie McCarthy
received in 1938.
may13

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: July 19, 2006 7:21:50 PM CDT
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.

When the going gets tough, the tough go to a pig roast of course.

Mr. President,
It really sucks being you.

Your famous "hands off" policy has done wonders. Early in your presidency you allowed Israel to have unfetter reign over the palestinians, allowing Israel to kill who ever they wanted whenever they wanted. After 9/11 they stepped up their efforts of state-sponsored terrorism over their Arab neighbors. The world was suitably distracted watching the death, and destruction you were causing in Iraq, so no one noticed the atrocities Israel was committing.

Now you have a good party happening. Israel is fighting a two front war. And they told Condi to stuff it when she asked Israel to restrain their response.

It's not that you will do anything about it. You don't have the guts to stand up to Israel, and everyone knows it.

Italy is still looking to indict CIA agents for kidnapping a Muslim cleric off the streets in Milan. What kind of bungling Bush-supporters did you get in there?


Rove was booed when he met with Hispanics from the National Council of La Raza's annual conference in Los Angeles, but somehow they couldn't relate to a rich white man who only wants them pick grapes, join the army, and vote Republican. It was odd to hear him speak about family values.

Valerie Plame just sued your buddy Cheney, Rove, and others for outing her as a CIA spy. I can imagine the morale in the CIA must be crappy ever since you falsely blamed them for bad intelligence on Iraq.

Now you are in Russia with your new nemesis Pooty Poot.

While in Germany instead of addressing the major escalation of violence in the Mid-East with Israel, you chose to tout a pig roast with German Chancellor Angela Merkel. It is not a book about a pet goat, but it's good enough to show the world how disconnected you still are
pic_060713_cvr_lebanon_8p.tsm368x178 .Pig-Roast
While in Germany you were such a chicken-shit about what people may ask, you dropped a planned "Town Hall meeting" after you were not allowed to pre-approve questions although you were granted the restrictions you asked for on the kinds of people that could attend.

Where has our macho president in his flight suit? Suddenly, you are spouting about negotiating with North Korea, apologizing for declaring "Bring them on," Have you lost your manhood? Will you need your pants refitted to incorporate your reduced testicles?

Well, have a good time with pooty poot. I am sure he is ready to have you lecture him about democracy. You have a real model of democracy going for you here at home. It is the best damn democracy you can buy.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: July 14, 2006 2:17:51 AM CDT
To: guzmatom@mac.com

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House is
unable to respond to every message, and therefore this response
is an autoreply.

Thank you again for taking the time to write.