Sep 2006
GOP fear tactics

It's time to go to the dark side again.

Mr. President,
Facts are for suckers, crafting the truth is where it's at.

You have made it harder this year junior. I don't know what are we going to do with you.

Since you often have been caught lying so the only thing, you can do is, what you have always done; draw us into your alternative reality. Your GOP has to make us question what we saw and heard.

Much of America wanted to believe the reasons you gave us for invading Iraq, even though many of us knew it was wrong to invade a country that did nothing to hurt us.

Over the last five years, that trust in your leadership evaporated like sweat on a hot pig, as we caught you and your minions lying over and over again.

Fortunately, it is time for Congressional elections which present you with an opportunity to boost your ratings from the 30's and break into the solid 40's.

The election season means dragging as many of Americans as you can through the neo-conservative's black hole and into your "reality," where you have never lied and everything you did was exactly the right thing to do.
blackhole
To lead voters onto the path to your inner sanctum, confront Americans right up front and ask," Who are you going to believe me or your lying eyes? That'll stop them in their tracks, then waving shiny objects, perhaps the stars on the American flag in front of us to distract and redirect our thoughts.

It is at this point you utter the following mantra into our ears over and over again, : "We will be invaded by terrorists if Democrats win and you will die." "Republicans are strong; Democrats are weak." "Vote Republican if you want to live."
amernylon
The combination of sparkling stars from the American flag, the curt denial of doing anything wrong, plus our eventual acceptance of repeating your republican mantra over and over again should do the trick.

It's worked for every election since 9/11 why shouldn't it work again?


But just in case it doesn't work, you might want to retain a personal lawyer for all those nasty investigations the Democrats will initiate if they win the House.

Happy trails buddy.

From: comments@whitehouse.gov
Date: September 14, 2006 1:22:18 AM CDT
To: guzmatom@mac.com

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